Ashram Vyavastha (Stages of Life) - A Commentary

Since the dawn of civilization, every culture has endeavoured to find a better structure to conduct itself according to prevalent conditions. These conditions range from social, political, economic, geographical and nature provided conditions prevailing at a given time and place. However, as a society if the structure does not provide stability to fluctuations in the aforementioned conditions then that system is not meeting its requirements. As civilizations have matured, systems have been created by religion, monarchs and through democracy. Whether it is religious books, dictates’ from monarchs or modern constitution, the systems to conduct the business of a society need a firm structure.

Whoever creates the system, it adoption depends upon participation from the society. To ensure participation, the system needs to be logical, easy to understand and easy to implement. Considering the diverse make of a population in the society there is always a training aspect of a system and a time lag in implementation of any system. This is the reason why there have been so many systems for conducting a society throughout history. However, whichever system is put in place in whichever era, for it to function properly, it needs a relevant and time tested structure.

Such structure was put in place centuries ago by the wise men centuries ago was called the Ashram Vyavastha or the Stages of Life System. Ashram literal meaning is a place of learning that is away from distractions. However, in this context it is used in the sense of stages of life that have something to learn, offer and transfer to each other in the society. It must be pointed out that this structure provides a base to any system and has no religious angle to it in any way. It was put in place at a time and in place that followed Sanatana Dharma or ageless way of life. 

Often likeminded people come together and make a community of themselves. The community when it grows into a civilization, needs rules to be followed. Sanatana Dharma gave those rules and they were separate from religious or spiritual teachings. Ashram Vyavastha was part of these rules that made the society run smoothly and predictably in a time tested manner.

According to this structure, the stages in life were divided in four parts and no matter who you are, what vocation you have or which part of society you belong to, it applied to all. The four stages are namely:

 

1. Vidyarthi Ashram (Student Stage)

2. Grihastha Ashram (Household Stage)

3. Vanaprastha Ashram (Transfer of Knowledge Stage)

4. Sannyasa Ashram (Renunciation, detachment or Self Focus Stage)

 

Vidyarthi Ashram - Student Stage of Life

Scientists have pointed out that about 50% of learning happening before a child is 5 yrs. old. From mastering the senses, to communication and language to recognition and cognition, it is lot of data that is processed at tender age. The kind of data processed through observation and context itself is huge. Children at very young age are able to differentiate the behaviour and action of parents with what they teach or preach. Often children will follow the actions and ignore the lecture. It is rightfully said "Practice what you Preach" because it is difficult to know who is observing and getting influenced with one's actions.

Vidyarthi is a Sanskrit word made by joining two words Vidya meaning Knowledge and Aarthi means Seeker. Thus a Vidyarthi is a student, a seeker of knowledge. The first stage of life is to imprint the clean slate that is the mind with meaningful knowledge
Mothers are the first teachers followed by the immediate family. They inherently become the first to shape the thought, habits, values and culture to the young mind. If the entire family follows the same, the impression on child's mind is permanent. Children get identified with values they project and actions they take.
Teachers are the next set of influencers. Teachers are people with something to offer to the young minds. They are many and can come from anywhere. As children move on to become students and progresses in life, they begin to identify teachers in their lives. Some impart formal education and some provide character building. Influencers, mentors, Gurus and leaders, they come in many flavours and shape a students life.

 

This stage of life, makes a student ready for graduating into Grihastha Ashram. There is no specific age limit for graduating. Sometimes, students feels that they are ready and other times, they need prodding from their teachers. Some, continue to be life long learner and never leave this stage. Some move directly to Vanaprastha.

Grihastha Ashram - Household Stage of Life

All species including humans have innate desire to procreate, to expand their own species. If we look at the spectrum of all species, each have its own timeline as to when to procreate, how to prepare for it and how to take care of the progeny. "Grihastha Ashram" is that stage of life where humans just do that. Having learnt the basics of life and how to provide for oneself and other in Vidyarthi Ashram, now we look for a suitable partner to start a family. For giving proper balance to Grihastha or household, nature requires a pair to procreate and then take care of progeny till the progeny is able to fend for themselves. Without going into the debate of single parenting versus dual parenting, I would just stick to role based parenting where there are two roles required for procreating and nurturing the progeny. Whether its one person or two or many, it does not matter but the Grihastha’s primary role is to provide, nurture and protect. For a strong specie to thrive, the progeny needs to be stronger and adaptable to constant change. Role of Grihastha is to provide that environment so sustainability, safety and growth. The youthful years of 25-50 are spent this way. When we have the required strength and stamina to weather all kind of storms and shield our young ones. The primary focus of this time is to earn your living. From the hunter-gatherer days to the advent of agriculture and in the modern era, Grihastha have to earn enough so that the progeny develops with the required strength and in a safe environment. Sanatana Dharma teaches about धर्मार्थ कामः मोक्ष (Dharmarth Kamah Moksha) i.e. to earn and to procreate according to Dharma so that you can proceed for Moksha. Moksha is considered a state of bliss. State where you are contended with your being. Such state can be achieved only if there are no baggage from the life lived. Grihastha has to carry out their duties as per dharma. There will never be a limit to how much one should procreate or provide as long as it is according to dharma. Guidelines for Dharma have been provided in religious books in ancient cultures but in modern parlance, it has been replaced largely with Constitution of various countries. 

Once the Grihastha duties are done, one proceeds to the Vanaprastha Ashram.

 

Vanaprastha Ashram (Transfer of Knowledge Stage)

 

When does one graduate to Vanaprastha? Loosely translated, this refers to the stage where one is ready to proceed to Vana. Vana in Sanskrit is a forest. Literally saying Vanaprastha is exiling oneself to a forest. However, this is just literal translation. In older times, all the schools and places of knowledge and recovery were created in isolation. Cities were commercial hubs, forts for protection, villages for agriculture and forests were where hospitals and educational institutions existed. In this connotation, Vanaprastha means going to run places for caring, education and research. As a vidyarthi and grihastha, one has gathered enough knowledge to transfer to the new generation and enough experience to take care of elderly. There is no age to get in or exit Vanaprastha. Its an individual call when one feels ready to give back to society. Here one doesn’t feel pressured for day to day responsibilities to earn and provide. This is not a volunteer position however it is a stage where one feels free and comfortable to give back to society. One can still teach or treat and take care as part of their profession as a Grihastha. Vanaprastha stage takes the transfer of knowledge, research and care a step forward. Experience and calmness that comes with age enables one to fulfil the duties of Vanaprastha. The duties include taking care of elderly, those who have entered Sannyasa Ashram,  to enable them to finish their journey in a fulfilling manner. The duties also include, training vidyarthi to enable them for future stages of life. Its not mere education and training them for a vocation, Vidyarthi need to be trained for life as human beings. Vanaprastha is that stage of life which is as much future looking as much it is taking care of past. This stage of life prepares our future generation and takes care of our past generation when their Grihastha duties are fulfilled.

 

Sannyasa Ashram (Renunciation, detachment or Self Focus Stage)

When do we feel fulfilled? One way to look at a fulfilled life is to finally prepare ourselves for ending the journey. The business of living is finite. It will come to an end and how we have prepared for a beginning and a journey henceforth, we also need to prepare for its end. Sannyasa Ashram is the finality of our journey. We do not know when the journey would end but there comes a stage in life when we have provided for our future generation and we have taken care of our past generation and now finally the time comes to look inwards and see if it has all been fulfilling. The race and business of living has to come to an end and it is time to reflect and let go. Sannyasa Ashram prepares ourselves for detachment and letting go of all our baggage that we have collected so far. It’s not an easy task to let go. There have been so many accomplishments and gains over the years, there have also been regrets and guilts and there have also been unfinished business, unfulfilled desires and tasks. This stage goes into spiritual discovery with whatever means like religion or science, seeking knowledge about self, yoga etc. The means are to understand self in such a way that you finally let go and feel fulfilled of the life lived. The goal is to look at life from a third part angle in a nonchalant way. Journey ends, it does not restart after we reach the end. Finality is inevitable. Sannyasa Ashram stage makes us look at how the journey has been enjoyed, made us who we are and given us what we needed. At this time we have let go of the unfinished business to be taken care of by someone else, we have made peace with unfulfilled desires, accomplishments and regrets. 

 

 

Whether you are governed by religious texts, by monarchs or by a constitution, the Ashram Vyavastha or Stages of Life provides with a way to conduct yourself in any given situation. 

Wonders of the World

 I had a bucket list for places to see in this life. Everybody's list is different and the places they consider wonders of the world. The way I see it, we have wonders all around us, all the time. Our perspective and our viewpoint changes at different points in time. I have observed that what I consider as wonders of this world has kept on changing over time and also according to my circumstances.

I was awestruck when I first saw Grand Canyon in 1998 with few friends. It appeared majestic. I had no idea that such a place exist up until the point you are approaching it. I had not seen a picture or anything about the Grand Canyon till I first saw it with my own eyes. It was really exciting. About four years later, I had another chance to visit and this time with my mother, wife and 9 month old son. All through the drive from Vegas to Grand Canyon, I was telling them, how majestic and big it is and how I felt when I first saw it. When we reached there and we walked up to the rim, I again felt excited, this time for my mother and wife. However, their reaction was not what I expected. I guess, I had built up the expectations a bit too much. After all, it was just a valley cut through by Colorado river over thousands to years. To me also, the excitement or the wonder was not the same as before. There may not be a next time for me to make the same effort to visit.

So wonders of the world are really in the eye of the beholder as well as the passage of time. But, if something ceases to excite us, appear beautiful or appear not worth a visit after a while, is it still a wonder? I have revised my bucket list quite often. The way it stands now is in two parts. I have a list of places to visit and things that I want to do just once. The list is more of a checklist and I would just cross the items as a complete them.

Then there is a second list. It's recurring. I don't want to check off the items. I want to do them in a repeat mode. These are the wonders that do not cease to exist and I am awestruck every time I experience them. I think I can never get bored of seeing a sunrise or a sunset. I would never get tired of counting the ocean waves. I could always listen to the flowing river. I would want to trek to a hill and watch endlessly over the horizon. I could gaze over the clear night sky and wonder what lies beyond. These wonders never cease to exist and are there for me to experience any time. The only thing I wonder is how long will I be able to keep up.  

बंदी आशाओं के

 मेरी खिड़की से दिखता है 

मुझे थोड़ा सा आकाश।

कभी सूरज की किरणें झांकती हैं 

तो कभी चंद्रमा का प्रकाश।

सुबह होने पर पंछियों की चहचहाट सुनता हूँ 

तो कभी साँझ ढले मोटरों की आहट।

बारिश की बूँदें भी अक्सर छन आती हैं 

तो कभी तीखी धूप झुंझला जाती है।

यह झरोखा नित नए रूप दिखाता है 

मानो एक नया चलचित्र सामने आया है।

कभी भोर का सूरज बादलों की आग़ोश 

में सिमट कर छुप सा जाता है।

कभी पूनम का चांद खुल कर 

अपनी रोशनी में मुझे भिगो जाता है।

यह छोटा से एक झरोखा 

एक नयी ज़िंदगी एक नए रूप को 

कुछ पल के लिए मेरे मन में 

अंकित कर जाता है।

ऐसा ही एक झरोखा 

मेरे अंतःकरण में भी है।

यह मुझे नित नए आयामों से 

मेरा परिचय कराता है।

यह झरोखा मुझे स्वतंत्र करता है 

मुझे आभास कराता है

मैं बंदी नहीं हूँ अपनी आशाओं का 

मुझे दिखता है थोड़ा सा आकाश।

बस पंख फैलाने हैं और 

उड़ना है इस झरोखे के बाहर।

एहसास - A Realisation

किसी के सुरीले स्वर सुनकर 
किसी के बनाए सुंदर चित्रों को देखकर 
मन ही मन एक आवाज़ उठी 
क्या परियोजन है मेरा इस जगत में  

किसी ने बड़े अविष्कार किए 

किसी ने लोगों को जीवनदान दिए 

मन ही मन दोबारा  आवाज़ उठी 

क्या मेरे कर्म  ने जीवन तारे 

किसी का कौशल युद्ध में दिखा 

किसी ने अपना परचम शिखरों पर फहराया 

मन ही मन वही आवाज़ उठी 

क्या उपयोगी रहा मेरा जन्म  

किसी ने बड़े संगठनों को जन्म दिया 

किसी का कौशल बड़ी इमारतों में दिखा 

मन ही मन फिर वही आवाज़ उठी 

क्या इस जीवन को भरपूर जिया  

कई दिनों तक इस ख़याल ने 

बेचैन किया  रातों को जगाया बहुत 

मन के प्रश्न दूर नहीं हुए कभी 

सोचा बहुत तो एक ही ख़याल आया।

शायद मेरे होने से ज़्यादा 

और कुछ ज़रूरी नहीं था 

मेरे साथ चलने वालों के लिए 

मेरा होना ही काफ़ी था।

समर्पण इस वर्ष को - Surrender to this year

 स्वच्छंद मस्त और मदमाती
हवा का झोंका था वो 
निष्फ़िकर मासूम और चंचल
बालक के समान था वो 

सिंह के समान विचरना
गज़ के समान मदमस्त
सम्पूर्ण जगत का जैसे स्वामी
ऐसा आचरण था उसका

कभी हृदय से कवि होता
लेखनी से कभी साहित्य सृजक
कभी शिल्प का सृजन करता
तो कभी एक दर्शक 

उसका जीवन मानो एक 
रोमांचकारी यात्रा
हर उगता सूरज मानो
एक नया ध्येय प्रकटाता

वर्ष बीते इसी समान
और अब आया एक नया वर्ष
अभूतपूर्व अपरिचित और अद्वितीय

बीते वर्ष एक धुंधली स्मृति से लगे  
सम्पूर्ण जगत मानो थम गया 
समय का चक्र चल तो रहा था 
पर रथ की गति कुछ सुस्त सी थी 

हृदय की कामनाएँ वही थीं 
ध्येय पर अब बदल गए थे 
सारा दृष्टिकोण अब जीवन पर केंद्रित था 
लक्ष्य अब उत्तरजीविता का था 

उपाय तो बहुत हुए 
आँकलन गणित विज्ञान पर विचारा गया 
उत्तर एक समान ही मिला 
समय रुका नहीं है बस धीमा चल रहा है 

समर्पण किया इस वर्ष को 
समय को परखा और दायित्व निभाए 
जीवन और उत्तरजीविता को पहचाना 
और समर्पित किए चले कालचक्र को 

जीवन है तो ध्येय है
जीवन है तो लक्ष्य बनेंगे 
जीवन है तो सब मुमकिन है 
समर्पण है इस समय को समर्पित हम भी 

समर्पण - Surrender

कुछ डगमग कुछ गिरते सम्हलते
नन्हें क़दम लेकर चलना सीखा
एक बड़ी सफलता थी एक बड़ी बात
अपने दो पैरों पर अब था भरोसा

कुछ पढ़ाई कक्षा में हुई कुछ घर पर 

ज्ञान गुरु से लिया कभी थोड़ा घर पर

पुस्तकें सारी पढ़ डाली  किए अनेक प्रयोग

विद्यार्थी से आर्थी बनने का पूरा किया संकल्प

अब नहीं कोई रोक सकेगा यही थी सोच 

अनेक योजनाएँ बन और बिगड़ रही थीं

कुछ ने रूप लिया और कुछ ने आकार

सपने अब होते लग रहे थे साकार

हर स्तिथि फेंक रही थी एक नया प्रश्न

हर परिस्थिति बनके खड़ी थी एक चुनौती

सामना करने था भरपूर हौसला

पूरी ताक़त थी और मन में दृढ़ संकल्प

कभी थमें कभी लिया सहारा पर बढ़े सदा आगे 

खड़ा किया एक अपना साम्राज्य जीतकर 

कभी लड़कर और कभी समझौता करके

जीवन को जिया आदर्शों से मथकर 

रहता नहीं हमेशा समय एक समान 

जीवन का चक्रव्यूह करता है क्षीण

समान बल नहीं रहा है अब 

नहीं है वो हौसला और हिम्मत

बाक़ी है जीवन अभी और भी 

चलना है इन विकट राहों पा अभी भी

पर एक गहरी साँस लेकर सोचता हूँ

समय अब किया मैंने तुझपे समर्पण

धूमकेतु - Shooting Star

 दूर बादलों की ओट से  क्षितिज के समीप 

एक प्रकाश पुंज निकला और आकाश के मध्य विलुप्त हो गया 

किसी ने उसे अपनी आँखों में भर लिया 

किसी ने उसे एक तसवीर में क़ैद कर लिया 

मंत्रमुग्ध कुछ पलों के लिए आकाश पर दृष्टि टिक गयी 

कुछ ने ईश्वरीय चमत्कार समझ एक एक वरदान माँग लिया 

वह समय था जब काले गगन को चीर के 

मानो एक सुनहरी खड़ग ने उजाला कर दिया 

किसी ने कहा धूमकेतु है ये गहरे काले अंधकार में 

क्षण मात्र के लिए आशा का प्रकाश भर गया 

था वह स्वछंद पूरे आकाश का मानो स्वामी 

आशाओं से भरी और संकल्पों से सजी शुरुआत 

उसकी योजनाओं की कोई सीमा न थी 

उसके विश्वास में भी कोई कमी न थी 

और बनके उसे धूमकेतु, पूरी धरा  को 

आशा और प्रकाश से भर देना था 

नहीं था उसकी सोच में अपना कोई भविष्य 

न ही था उसका इरादा क्षणभंगुर जीवन का 

जगत सारा एक अंधकार में डूबा था

करना था उसे सबको जागृत प्रकाशित 

पर समय का निश्चय जैसे कुछ और ही था 

पर वह न कर पाया जो उसने सोचा था 

वह धूमकेतु एक उल्का पिंड बन अस्त हुआ 

अनंत नहीं, बस कुछ समय ही जीवन रहा 

क्षण भर के लिए प्रकाशित किया इस धरती को  

जहां उसे अनंत ज्योति बन कर रहना था